My childhood was not pretty. I was raised in several “homes” and foster homes. Both my parents were alcoholics…in fact, they met at an AA meeting! Both of them had several failed marriages and relationships which resulted in various children. I have siblings, step-siblings and half-siblings, some of whom I’ve never met, even to this day. Others I was raised with on and off at different times and various circumstances. To say the least…it was a confusing, chaotic, and unstable childhood. Through all the chaos and confusion, there was one consistent thing in my life- that was the AV 1611 King James version of the Holy Bible.

My father, (believe it or not) was a southern Baptist preacher! He would preach about the love of Christ and the peace which passeth all understanding, but my father never knew peace, nor did he have a clue about the meaning of the word “love.” (I struggle with the meaning of it myself) As my siblings all turned to drugs, alcohol, sex or insanity as an escape from the torment of our lives, I turned to the Bible. I started memorizing it at an early age. By the time I was 16 years old, I was carrying my Bible with me to school every day and quoting whole chapters. When I was 26 years old, I quoted the first 14 chapters of Matthew on a TV show called,”The Parade Of Miracles”. It was broadcast from a church called The People’s Baptist Church in Corpus Christi, Texas.

I didn’t know Christ or His love, but I wanted to know him. I longed to know him. As I poured over my scriptures, I found reference to Christ in every chapter I could from both the Old and the New Testaments. I wrote poems, read books (many books),about Christ, New Testament times and Old Testament times. As I matured into adulthood, I started “church hopping”, checking out many different churches and religions, each one claiming to have the only truth. Each one claimed that they were the the true church, and with each new church, I came away feeling empty. Finally, after my marriage failed and I started raising my two children alone, I decided to give up on church altogether. Although I could quote scripture better than most preachers I knew, I still lacked an understanding of who Christ was. I knew about him, but I didn’t know him. My problem was 18 inches long. There are 18 inches between your head and your heart. I had Christ’s words in my head, but they had not reached my heart. If I missed Heaven…it was going to be by 18 inches!

Then, one night I happened to see a commercial for a free Book of Mormon, another Testament of Jesus Christ. Wow! It had never occurred to me that the Book of Mormon was a “Testament of Jesus Christ.” I had the Old Testament and the New Testament, what was this? A third Testament? I had never heard of such a thing! Maybe that was the missing piece! I grabbed my phone and dialed the number! When the person on the other end asked if I would like someone to visit me, as well as receive my free copy of the Book of Mormon, I said,” yes!” I had my first visit in February 2004. God bless those missionaries! I sure gave them a run for their money! I knew we were in the “last days”, and the the Bible says,”Yea, let God be true, but every man a liar” (Romans 3:4). I did not trust them; I knew many false prophets would arise in the last days, but I gave them my word that I would not make any decisions until I had read the Book of Mormon.

A funny thing happened as I started reading the Book of Mormon-I recognized my beloved Bible on every page! It didn’t start in First Nephi,either…it started with the introduction to the Book of Mormon and then the testimonies of the witnesses. I recognized God’s numbers, His “set” way of organization; I started pulling out God’s numbers-3,8,12-from the very first pages and I knew that this book was lining up with my Bible. As I read on, I decided that the Book of Mormon was either written by God or by Satan, but it could not have been written by any man! The wisdom was too deep. It lined up too well with the Bible, on so many levels. I knew that it was just not possible for man to have written this book. As I realized this, at first, I feared in my heart that the Book of Mormon was a counterfeit. Was this the strong delusion sent by Satan in the last days that my Bible had warned me about? Were these missionaries the false prophets that I knew would arise in the last days? I was sure in my heart that the Book of Mormon was a supernatural book, but to which end? I also knew that “ol’ smutty face” was a master of imitation and forgery. If anybody could make a “copy” of the Bible, yet twist it, he could! But the missionaries kept telling me to pray about it, and ask God if it was the truth. Satan wouldn’t advise me to ask God about anything! The Bible says in Isaiah 55:11 that God’s word will not return void and it didn’t. I had not memorized all that scripture for naught.

There was only one conclusion I could make about the Book of Mormon. My Bible came back to me and testified to me as I read each page of the Book of Mormon. The Holy Spirit was there too, and so were the missionaries…patiently putting up with my endless questions. I swam through a sea of confusion, but God knew my heart and he guided me back to him. Praise God!!! I’ve finally found the true church of Jesus Christ, and I can testify from my very soul that the Book of Mormon is the truth. It changed my life and it is the final piece to the puzzle of my life. The pieces have come together and I finally have the whole truth. I finally know Christ…REALLY know him, and I have felt his love for REAL this time. I’m home…at last!!!

I was inspired to write this poem during our Stake Conference in November of 2004. I had been reading LDS poetry from a book that I had borrowed from the church library and I had this feeling of frustration that all the LDS poetry that I had read so far kept painting this “rosy” picture of happy childhoods and “goodly” parents and how the heroin’s had to find their own testimonies. I thought to myself, why doesn’t anybody write about not being born into this church, yet finding their testimony? I was thinking these thoughts while listening to Conference when the Lord whispered into my heart…”Why don’t YOU write that poem?” I wrote it that night after Conference.

The Mortal Test

A spirit I was, a mortal to be…
The father came and spoke to me.
You’ve kept, my child, your first estate
and now it’s time to delegate…
A mother to give you mortal birth
a body and a place on Earth.
I know you’d like your mother, “kind”
but I have something else in mind.

You see, my child, it’s easy to be
in a holy family that pleases me.
What’s not so easy and takes more grit
is to be placed with parents that are unfit.
A childhood filled with fear and unrest,
you must endure and pass the test.
As you struggle through confusion and pain
Your efforts to find me again will not be in vain.

I love you and I’ll guide you back
if you will withstand Satan’s attack.
Your progression greatly will be multiplied
and I’ll be there waiting on the other side…
with rewards beyond you wildest dream
because you took the path extreme.
The Earth will be your proving ground
but Heaven is where you will be crowned.
You will receive rewards so sweet,
just toss them all at Jesus’ feet.

You will then be allowed to look upon my face
and once again receive your heavenly mother’s embrace.
I know you can do this, I have no doubt
because you’re a spirit Divine and devout.
I’ve planned this life and task to do
because I have great confidence in you.

(1 Corinthians 10:13)
I know God won’t give me anything that I can’t handle…
I just wish He didn’t trust me so much!!!!!

In the days of Christ and his apostles it was common to see the gifts of the Spirit and of the Priesthood of God in action. In fact, it was so powerful and impressive that Simon approached the Lord’s chosen representatives in an attempt to buy their same power. The result, of course, is that he was told his money will perish with him because the power of the priesthood is not for sale at any price.

Only God can grant the powers the apostles possessed. The majority of contemporary Christendom has no concept of that power, nor do they readily accept the fact that it has been restored to the earth with the Lord’s one true church in this last dispensation. Therefore, they do not share in the joy and blessings that are the result of its presence among the believers.

Among the powers that were shown by the priesthood anciently was the power to heal the sick. That is restored again today. I have personally been the instrument of the Lord’s will in the healing of many people. Some have been relatively undramatic and others have been nothing less than miraculous.

Many years ago I and a missionary companion were urgently called to the home of a young woman possessed by an evil spirit. We knew that the person before us was in no way the same girl that we had previously been introduced to. We saw in her eyes a true resentment that was aimed at us. She seemed like an animal backed into a corner but attack might in an instant. After sitting her in a chair, we laid hands upon her head and I began pronouncing a blessing upon her promising that the spirit would depart. As these words were spoken, my companion felt a charge of electricity rush up his arms as the spirit withdrew from the girl. In seconds, she was again the girl we knew. She related how she was aware of the hatred that the evil spirit had felt for us and that she felt as if she were unclean and unworthy in our presence.

Another time, one of my own sons was stricken with a bout of asthma so severe that his chest nearly collapsed. I called a man who was not only a friend, but the home teacher assigned to our family. We laid hands upon my son after anointing him with consecrated oil. I then pronounced upon him a command that the affliction would leave him and he would begin to breathe again. As we finished, the attack left him totally and he, then ten years old, comforted his frightened mother with the assurance that he had felt it in his very bones that he was now all right.

Fairly recently I was asked to help give a blessing to a woman who was not a member of the Church, but is of the lineage of Israel. I trusted her faith; my eldest son and I proceeded to bless her with the Lord’s will. I had just found out that she had cancer and was due to have her bladder removed. In the blessing I was prompted to tell her that the cancer would begin from that very time to reverse and would then disappear altogether. My son said he felt the presence of at least two others in the room, although we could not see them. He felt the hand of one of them on his shoulder. The power in the room was so intense that I was barely able to speak the words of the blessing. Ten days or so later, my son called me to announce that she had just returned from the doctor and that he had pronounced her free of cancer.

The power of God is real and faith is a genuine scientific principle. I bear my personal and sincere witness that it is true and that the ancient priesthood of God is again on the earth in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, along with its accompanying powers and blessings among the faithful.

When i was nineteen years old, i met missionaries. They told me about eternal family and my heart just felt something special feeling going through my whole body. They asked me to pray to know the truth. I was kind of afraid that because i was a Buddhist and i didn’t want to deny my god at that time;however, i took their advise and i did kneel down and pray with all my heart. The tears were coming out from my eyes when i said my prayer. I did know the Book of Mormon was true and Joseph Smith was the true prophet of God at that time. After two years, i served my mission in Hawaii Honolulu Mission and i returned home with honor. After many challenges in my life, i finally got married with my sweet heart last April. I know the Lord blesses his children in different ways and i am really grateful for many blessings i have been received.